Zeusblog

Having recently worked with a neuro-occupational-therapist on her website and discussing how many of her clients have suffered head injuries while cycling, I always wear a helmet when I’m cycling, but I am constantly surprised at how many people don’t. She sent us this video the other day, and I thought that if I had a bike shop, and I put this clip on my website that I’d sell shedloads of bike helmets.

See what you think…

I read, in Runners World of all places, that this week is National Doughnut Week. Apparently bakeries that are taking part are giving money from the sales of doughnuts to the Children’s Trust charity. I don’t know much about the Children’s Trust, but I’m sure they’re doing good work, so as it’s in a good cause, why not fill your face with doughnuts? I know I’m going to

There was an article in the Guardian last Saturday, reviewing the Gillette TV ad where a mechanic looks at a razor. You can read it here. All very amusing – why we don’t need a blue strip to turn white to tell us when we need to change our razor, because a blunt and clogged blade will lacerate your skin to ribbons waaay before the strip changes colour – but then the writer went too far, suggesting that the reason there are so many beards about these days is because razor blades are too expensive.

So I’d just like to make it clear that the reason I’ve joined the beardies is not because I can’t afford the blades (although my wife does describe my beard as “looking a bit homeless” when it gets too long), but is because I am too lazy to shave. I just wanted to make that very clear.

Chalky

You may have seen the stories recently of photographers being hassled by police for taking pictures of St.Pauls Cathedral or of other public buildings. Well I’ve recently become interested in photography and have taken to wandering the streets with a camera in my pocket like some kind of overgrown art student. I haven’t been arrested yet, but was asked by a policewoman as to the purpose of a photo I was taking (of a car that had had its roof cut off by firemen – nothing gory, just the car) so I’m thinking of getting one of those little badges that say “I’m a photographer not a terrorist”. The group that makes them is having a demo in Trafalgar Square on 23rd January and I’m contemplating joining in. I think it will be interesting to see (photography joke coming up…) how many of this flashmob will use available light.

http://PhotographerNotaTerrorist.org/2009/12/mass-photo-gathering/

Later on in the month there’s another interesting demonstration. At 10:23am on January 30th, more than 300 homeopathy sceptics nationwide will be taking part in a mass ‘homeopathic overdose’ in branches of Boots. The point they’re making is that the homeopathic pills that Boots give credibility to by stocking are both ineffective and harmless. There’s lots more on the silliness that is homeopathy at http://www.1023.org.uk/

Wow! This is what it must have been like in the sixties – c’mon everyone, let’s all take photos and sugar pills and stick it to the man!

Last night, the Duke of Edinburgh’s design prize was awarded to Andrew Ritchie, the man who invented the Brompton folding bike. He thoroughly deserves his prize, and I think Phil should have got the missus to knight him too. Unlike James Dyson who made a big fuss about British ingenuity and then moved his manufacturing abroad, Andrew Ritchie manufactures these splendid little bikes here in London. Good for him!

You can read the news story here

I saw this morning that the Advertising Standards Authority have said that Swiftcover’s TV ad featuring Iggy Pop must not be shown again in its current form as it is misleading – he doesn’t actually have a policy with them and, in any case, they don’t cover musicians. Swiftcover have now started to cover musicians, but I still think the ad should be pulled on the grounds that it is rubbish.

Chalky

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away (well, Salford actually), I used to be a car salesman. One of the things I was taught was that it is a good thing for your customer to have a problem. Deal with it well, as Saab recently did for me (click here to read), and you have won a customer for life. It’s true of any sales situation, not just cars. Of course, the opposite applies too. Which brings me to Renault.

Renault started well. Our nearly three year old diesel Clio has an amazing engine with incredible economy (50mpg round town, and I once averaged 72mpg on a London-Birmingham-London trip), has very low emissions (so only £35 a year tax), came with 0% finance, and we bought 3 year’s servicing for only £100. So far, so good.

But then, bit by bit you begin to realise why you don’t often hear the words ‘quality’ and ‘French engineering’ together very often. Inside the car it’s all a bit plasticky and things rattle and squeak. Then there was that strange banging noise that turned out (after trying to discover its source by driving up and down the road leaning over the back seat with my head in the boot until I was nearly sick) to be a loose exhaust heat shield.

And when you throw a bit of good old-fashioned British jobsworthyness into the mix it can all get a bit annoying. A couple of months ago, it sounded like the exhaust was blowing. So, a little surprised that it hadn’t even lasted three years, I popped into Kwik Fit. It turned out not to be the exhaust but an air filter cover. The Kwik Fit guy showed me the gouge mark where whoever had serviced the car had prised it open with a screwdriver and broken the catch. As the local Renault dealer had serviced it from new, I pointed out the problem and asked them to remedy this when the car was in for its annual service.

Here was their chance to make me a customer for life and an advocate for their brand. So what did they do?

Thy kept me waiting outside for twenty minutes (I was on time by the way) while they shuffled cars from the workshop to the forecourt, and, I kid you not, went off to buy milk and a newspaper. Then, when they rang at lunchtime, they said it wasn’t anything to do with them and the best they could do was put a screw in it. They had no explanation of how it could have happened, even though they were the only people ever to have been under the bonnet with tools. I asked them how much the part that they had broken would cost to replace. £35.

£35! Just £35 (which is the retail price not what it actually costs them) and I’m onside, on message, on brief, telling everyone how great they are. But they blew it. Argued with me on the phone. Kept me waiting. Told me I had to be back for it before 5:30 or I wouldn’t see it again until after they’ve fetched the milk and newspaper on Monday morning. Argued with me on the forecourt when I expressed my displeasure at the botch job they’d done (screwed it shut with a self-tapper!). So now, instead of word-of-mouth, they get word-of-bad-mouth from me.

The moral of this story? Problems happen. How you deal with them can make all the difference to your business. Needless to say I won’t be buying another Renault.

Chalky

Yesterday I ranted on about, among other things, potholes. Today I’m riding my Brompton for the first time in ages, and to be honest, seeing all the potholes on the way in this morning, I am not looking forward to negotiating them in the dark on the ride home. I’m not keen on potholes at the best of times, but with the little wheels on my fold-up bike they are deadly. 

So what’s a cyclist to do? In fact, what’s anyone to do? (They damage cars too.)

If you see a pothole, report it via www.fillthathole.org.uk 

This is a splendid site run by CTC, The UK’s organisation for cyclists, that reports the potholes to the right people at the right department – and local councils, having had the potholes reported to them through the right channels, are obliged to act. 

I’ve tried it and it works. My local council filled in a pothole I reported via the site. They didn’t fill it in very well, but that’s another matter… 

Chalky

And come again on washing day…

At least the snow and ice was fun. This is just wet…

In the past, we may have expressed the opinion that men with beards were wierd and obviously using their facial hair as a mask behind which they were attempting to hide some deep psychological flaw.

We now know that not only are beard-wearers actually at the cutting edge of coolness, they are also the epitome of manliness.

Furthermore, with a beard, you look the same when standing on your head.